smooooooth

you know what's embarrassing? when you lend your coworker your camera so he can take photos of a work event and you think all that's on there is photos of snow


but you've forgotten about the photos you took of yourself modeling the new coat your mom got you for your birthday in the mirror

and a week later you realize this and you assume he must've seen them when he downloaded the photos to his computer, and so you bring it up by re-enacting the photos of yourself modeling your coat as a way of sort of laughing off the embarrassment, and then he tells you he didn't see them, he just dragged over the couple photos he needed based on the file date, but thanks for the re-enactment.

i love playing minesweeper

guilt

there was a little bug hovering around my desk just now, and when i clapped it between my hands, it fell to the desk but a tiny little fuzzy drifted upwards from the same spot in that same moment. and i'll tell ya, i don't technically believe that bugs have tiny little fuzzy souls, but i felt about 100 times worse than i usually do killing bugs.

cats on the internet: for education!

ok so you guys know how the internet started because cat owners needed a way to share photos and videos of their cats worldwide? well i'll tell you one good thing that has come from the internet: instant cat knowledge.

i've been worried about my cats lately because i saw this big, flesh-colored cat lurking in the trees outside my house -- what kind of cat is flesh-colored? he's not white and not orange, but somewhere in between, but not in a pretty way, just a fleshy way. and the look on his face... you can just tell he's up to something, and that something is not helping old lady cats cross the street. or maybe he is, but while he's doing it he's yoinking their old lady cat wallets out of their purses, which is even more evil than not helping them in the first place. i also saw him sitting right outside my cats' cat door when i came home the other day. i don't know if he's some hooligan friend of theirs or just waiting to beat them up, but either way, i don't like him.

so anyway, last night i was petting dodger, scratching his chin, when i noticed these brown spots all over his lips! i'd never seen them before, but i guess i hadn't looked in awhile, but i know i would've noticed them before if they were there. so i thought oh my gosh, what is going on?? has dodger been out there smoking so many cat cigarettes that he now has oral cat cancer?! where would he get cat cigarettes? lurky cat, of course! or -- gasp! is this some sort of cat STD?!? that dirty, fleshy, lurky cat! he WOULD have an STD. what am i going to doooo oh noooo my poor kitty : ((((((

so i googled it, and after the first couple pages of "OMG YOUR CAT HAZ DEATH DIZEAZ PLZ TAKE IT TO THE EMERGENCY DOCTOR VETZ RITE NOW OMGponies!!!!1!", i found a series of reputable sites that let me know orange cats get freckles on their lips with age, and it's nothing to worry about.

thank you, cat internet!!

caught on tape

guys this is really weird: i took this photo outside my office, just because the trees looked pretty, but once i uploaded it to my computer and took a closer look... well, see for yourself:

a fresh-baked loaf of bread, the fur of a lounging cat's belly, and a dryer lint trap

: things i would sleep in if i were just a liiiiiittle bit smaller.

post-halloween blues

some lady named Ruth in my office brought in a whole bag of Baby Ruths for halloween. it's like that's cute but maybe you could go by Snickers?