blast from the past

sometimes i forget microsoft paint can make jokes as good as photoshop.

same diff

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!

if you're wondering how i turned out so nice and smart, well, it's because every day as i headed out the door to school, my dad would say "have a good day, be nice to all creatures, and get a gob of hundreds!"

(he would seriously say that, i'm not making it up for blog's sake.)

my dad was also a big fan of doing winter activities with me and lora, like snowmobiling and building a giant igloo out of all the snow in the front yard or tying the sled to the back of his pickup with rope and pulling us down the alleyway until we crashed into a dumpster pretty hard that one time.

but i think my all-time favorite memory of me and my dad is in the first house we lived in in worland, waking up around 5am all sleepy-like and helping him put newspapers into the fireplace to light the logs so the house would be warm when we all woke up (for reals) later on. when lora and i got old enough to drive, he'd go out on cold mornings and turn our car heaters on for us about 10 minutes before we'd leave and scrape the ice from the windows.

thanks, dad! we were never cold growing up : )

math patterns

here is something i've noticed that leads me to believe there's something going on with buses they're not telling us:

• if i leave my house to catch the bus EXACTLY on time, i am RIGHT on time for work.
• if i leave my house just 30 seconds late, i am 12 minutes late to work!

now i have not tested further coordinates, but if i take one of the more common graphs out of a math book, it appears that buses have some mystical time-warping powers so that if one day i left my house just 10 minutes late, i would get to work approximately, like, 3 months late.


on the other hand, if i left early i could get to work in the past!

"hey, who did all the filing?" -boss
"i did!" -me [not true: because it doesn't exist yet.]

watch this

hey i really am gonna get back to blogging, but in the meantime check out my friend george cortez's stuff, i think he's really funny and you'll probably see him on some show that is funnier than SNL someday:

georgecortez.blogspot.com/
twitter.com/georgecortez
youtube.com/watch?v=npELW4rINes ("no like thanks" hahahahaha)

going to the beach

gotta get my beach body ready:

irritable bowl syndrome

(sorry, i got a new job and am generally havin' fun, but i miss you guys!)

skip the middleman

my favorite part of eating cheetos is licking the cheesidue off my fingers when i'm done. so why not cut out the middleman and get straight to the point?